Not only does this game have one of the longest titles I’ve seen in a licensed game, but I’ll go on record now and say that it’s one of the best licensed games ever made. I’m a fucking nerd, through and through, and this game has given me everything I could have ever hoped for in a Wolverine game. I say that not only as a comic book nerd, but also a videogame nerd. This might be a deterrent for you. I can understand that.

From this point forward I’ll be referring to this game as “Wolverine,” because I don’t feel like typing out the fucking 8-word title, nor am I a fan of acronyms. I’m 22 years old, and I refuse to start liking acronyms now. It’d just be inconvenient…and strange.

So, where to begin? Wolverine is an amazing game. Its even more so amazing when you’ve previously played X2: Wolverine’s Revenge. For those of you unfamiliar with Wolverine’s Revenge, let me give you the lowdown: It was pretty awful. Mark Hammil played Wolverine, and the story had little to no connection to the X2 movie (why it had the X2 moniker is obviously only for tie-in purposes). There were cameos left and right, with Beast and Spider-Man, but neither of those characters could make that game any easier to wade through. It was obscenely difficult, with no real pay off. But why does this matter in regards to the new Wolverine game? In X2 (and any other game in which you play Wolverine) you pop your claws and proceed to bop and smack people around. Never once do you slice a goddamn thing. No one seemed to care (most likely due to the lack of people playing it), but then what should come along? An M rated Wolverine game.

I’ll be the first to say that I was more than skeptical when I first saw ads for this game. It looked lame, and I wasn’t about to be let down again by my favorite mutant. But like a battered girlfriend, believing what he said about not hitting me again, I was drawn back in.

I’m weak.

Raven, the company responsible for the Marvel Ultimate Alliance, and X-Men Legends, had been working on this game for quite some time. When asked how they could produce an M rated game based on a PG-13 movie, the developers responded with “We started first.” And it shows. Considering how the movie ended up (not good), most people wouldn’t expect much from the game. But what shipped was a bloody brawler reminiscent of God of War, with a story that makes far more sense and leaps and bounds superior in every possible way.

With the length of the development cycle, the developers had a chance to polish up the game quite a bit. So, the game looks really decent. It’s not the best looking game out there, but it’s quite obvious that a lot of time, precision and care went into making this game. When shot or cut up, the damage shows on Logan’s skin (which allows for some close-ups on his insides), and stays on his clothes after his skin heals. It’s pretty spectacular. I want to say that there’s never been a game where Logan has looked this good, but with only one very specific gripe: the opening cinematic. The cut scene is violent and great, but Logan has the weirdest hair, and comes off as looking incredibly awkward. Aside from that? Wolverine is pretty pleasing to the eyes.

The game play isn’t challenging, but beat’em up games usually aren’t. Nor is it extraordinarily long; you can finish it around 8 or 9 hours, which is long enough with a game like this. I doubt most people looking into a game like this are looking for something that’s going to revolutionize the videogame world. What Wolverine is, is an example of one of the better licensed games ever produced. You get an incredibly violent brawler, with a story that tops it’s Hollywood counterpart (this happened previously with the Spider-Man 3 game, in which the reason why Sandman helps Venom makes far more sense in the game than in the film).

Going back to Wolverine’s Revenge, wherein you played Wolverine with what could only be rubber claws… It never made sense, to be playing a game as a visceral, violent animal, and only ever “knock out” enemies. The “real” Wolverine kills people; he slices, as well as dices, them. There should be blood, entrails, and massive amounts of gore. X-Men Origins: Wolverine delivers on all of those fronts. You play Wolverine during the most painful part of his existence, a Wolverine who wants to share that pain with everyone who gets in his way. If the message I’m trying to send is unclear, there’s an achievement for dismembering enemies… awesome.

The game is immensely entertaining for what it is, and it never attempts to be anything more than it is, which is commendable. Some people might find the game boring, and nothing to write home about, but anyone who is a fan of Wolverine (comic books or otherwise) can find some enjoyment from the game, if for nothing else than finally taking the reigns of Marvel’s greatest animal. Raven wanted to make a brawler with Wolverine, where he’s the best at what he does…and what he does? Well, it isn’t very nice.

I’ve never been one to hunker down and play a RTS (Real Time Strategy) game. Mostly because I enjoy actually playing video games and I’m also not allergic to natural sunlight. But I’m a huge tool who enjoys the Halo series, and I may or may not become giddy when I see Spartans on the cover of a game. Those fuckers piqued my interest, hooked me and opened my goddamned wallet. I’m such a loser.

I am a very stupid individual. This comes from years of playing videogames, I imagine. This is one of the reasons why I assume RTS games have completely bewildered me as a genre. I could never really get into them. That’s not to say I haven’t tried to get in on this genre before. I’ve played a good number of them, Command & Conquer, Starcraft, Age of Empires, and more recently Company of Heroes. Aside from just name-dropping, I’m letting you know that these games kicked my ass. After CoH, I kept my distance from the genre, assuming from that point on, RTS stuff wasn’t for me. Then I started hearing about a new Halo game…



I feel like the crew here on the Internauts are part of a small group of people who are fans of the Halo story, rather than just the multiplayer experience. This probably means we’re nerds (and by “probably” I actually mean “definitely”). Not to say I’m above tea bagging 9 year olds X-Box Live, but I’m pretty sure I finished the campaign before jumping into Matchmaking. That being said, I was only slightly interested in Halo Wars, it was a RTS after all.

The cut scenes in Halo Wars look phenomenal, giving a genuinely cinematic feeling. Unfortunately, the gameplay graphics suffer a bit. Most of the game looks great, but when you’re in the heat of an epic battle, every so often you’ll get clipping, slowdown or graphic hiccups. None of this is ever a big enough issue to hinder gameplay or ruin your experience.



I can’t help but stress how awesome some of the cut scenes are in this game. I have a hard time considering the events of an RTS as being epic, or even investing myself into the genre at all. The cut scenes in Halo Wars, oddly enough, helped keep me invested in the actual game. Even if you don’t buy or rent the game, I want you to go on Youtube and find the FMV that happens before the final level. Halo fan or not, you won’t be able to deny how badass it is.

As interested in the game as I might have been, I was apprehensive about the online multiplayer experience. Halo is a series that is heavily built upon a foundation of amazing multiplayer experiences, and this was completely against the “norm” in that respect. The first few matches I played on launch day were actually really entertaining, and fun. I have never played an online match in a RTS game that I can classify as fun. Halo Wars also has a co-op mode for the story campaign, so I went back through and played the game with another person. In doing so, I was able to find way more shit that was just scattered across the maps (skulls, energy, etc.). The downside to playing the game like this is how quickly you’ll find yourself completing missions; the game really just becomes a breeze to complete, lacking the difficulty curve that should be expected.

The game seems to be very streamlined in comparison to other RTS games, and this leads to a lot of the issues people have with it. A lot of people seem to be either completely against this “dumbed-down” RTS game, or against the fact that it’s on a console. This really shouldn’t be such an issue, considering the fact that it is an incredibly decent game, one that was handled by a company other than Bungie, and it was handled really well. This streamlined style helped me not be completely turned off by the gameplay. I didn’t feel ostracized, or made to feel like an asshole because I hadn’t spent my life playing games in the genre. It was a welcoming experience; one that actually made me want to play other RTS games, and invest more time into titles I had previously attempted. Sure, the Halo story hooked my interest, but the gameplay ensured that I pressed on and was able to finish the game (even when being brutally raped without lubricant in online matches).

Halo Wars isn’t a completely traditional RTS game. People complain that it’s too easy, that the mechanics are dumbed down, but it could prove to be the gateway drug into other RTS games. I found the game incredibly endearing, leaving me wanting to get strung out on other titles in the genre. I can obviously recommend the game to Halo nerds (not so much the fanboys who were expecting another FPS), but I’d also recommend this game to anyone who has had negative experiences with RTS games in the past… This might be exactly what you need to give the genre another shot.

Sitting down to review this game, I'm inclined to just stamp it with some kind of "Generic TPS" brand and move on; allowing you to make your own judgment based on whether or not you're entirely sick of this genre yet, but that wouldn't be responsible of me and it would fail to entertain, so instead, I'm going to tell you exactly why Wanted: Weapons of Fate is a complete waste of everyone's time and money.


At least he looks cool while he's doing boring shit.

Immediately of note is the fact that this game features a cover-system, as if a shooter can exist with out one in the post-Gears universe, and what's surprising is that it's actually well implemented. The transitions from cover to cover, and your ability to move extremely quickly between then, lend the stop-and-pop a healthy dose of speed not found in Gears of War and other like-minded games of the genre. However, it falters without a run button, making your movement to further points of cover feel sluggish and often times let the enemy take a couple free shots.

Of course, if you're not ducking for cover, you're shooting people, and Wanted pulls this off well enough. You've got your standard blind-fire and pop-and-shoot mechanics, but Wanted tries to make it's stake using "bullet curving", which is essentially an auto-lock instant kill move for most enemies. Once you've locked on to an enemy, you need to maneuver a curving line around environmental objects so that there's a clear trajectory to your target; it's a great way to keep the game moving when you get stuck with one of those enemies who doesn't seem to want to show his face. One curved bullet and they're history. The trick with bullet curving is that you need to build up adrenaline, portrayed using red bullets in the right-hand corner, by killing people in order to use it. Thankfully, GRIN noticed the only decent thing about Wanted was the bullet curving and made building your adrenaline extremely quick and easy.


This is cool, but it's not enough.

So, if Wanted does all this stuff fairly well, why am I so down on it? Because we've already fucking done this before! And not just half a dozen times, but in every other action game released since Gears of War brought these mechanics to the forefront back in 2006! It's gotten to the point where we're flooded with third person shooters, and only the very best are worth a look. It's like the mascot based platformers of the 16-bit era, you could throw a rock and hit one with decent mechanics, but who still gives a shit? Why are you going to bend over and pick up a penny when there's a dollar laying right beside it?

However, the most appalling trait Wanted is saddled with is its price point. At full price, there's no way in hell you should even think of buying it. If you were a huge fan of the comics and the movie, it would still be impossible to recommend. Even as an $9 week long rental, Wanted feels like a rip-off. At just under 4 hours in length, it feels more akin to the XBLA/PSN release of Watchmen: The End is Nigh than a full retail game, and it begs the question as to whether that should have been the case.

On very rare and altogether dismaying occasions, I'm cajoled into picking up a game that, under normal non-blue moon, frozen Hell circumstances, wouldn't even be on the fringes of my sorry excuse for mind. This happened quite recently, and the unfortunate purchase was You're in the Movies; what would seem to be a harmless camera-based party game. How wrong I was.

You're in the Movies, henceforth referred to as Shit, is, without question, one of the most broken piece of trash to ever sully the already trash-strewn shelves of game retailers. The basic premise of the game is that you and a couple friends, specifically friends you don't mind humiliating yourself in front of, become “actors” and take on specific roles in one of 30 unique movies. You then “compete” in a series of simple, motion-based mini-games, earning insignificant star power, and pulling ridiculous faces at the camera. Your “reward” for completing these often boring and rarely amusing “games” is a short, B-movie trailer; using all your actions and embarrassing facial contortions.

This, in itself, and all dislike for the pathetic mini-games aside, would be pretty amusing. In fact, I challenge you to watch at least one of these B-movie trailers starring your close friends and not crack up at it. I then challenge you to find a reason to play the game again, or find the next movie trailer as funny as the first. It won't happen. There are several reasons for this, one of the most prominent of which is the fact that the camera rarely fucking works!

In the course of trying Shit, my cohorts and I tried almost everything imaginable to get the fussy Live Vision camera to work as the game proposes it will, but to no avail. Before starting a session, Shit will ask for several things. The easiest of which is putting your camera in proper position so that everyone looks the correct size in the frame. The need to wear colorful clothing is also a must, as the camera can more readily pick you out from the background. Lighting, while not seemingly something that should make a gigantic difference, is a major problem. A shadow, or a slight change in lighting, whether from a ceiling fan, the movement of someone off camera, or the light from the TV itself, can leave your image nearly indecipherable, which, in turn, will make most, if not all of the mini-games impossible to play.

For example, I, as a person who rarely ventures beneath the searing orb that plagues the daylight hours of our planet, am as white as the fallen snow. When attempting to play against a white background, my arms and hands would sometimes disappear entirely, leaving me to look like a victim of some horrific war. And, try as a might, I couldn't get my stubby nubs to beat the drum quite like Shit wanted me to. On one occasion, where I needed to throw 3 poles as far as possible, my unfortunate handicap would not allow the game to continue. Other people attempted to throw the last diabolical pole, but the game wouldn't allow it, and instead decided it would be more amusing to sit there and blow an annoying horn while I flailed about like a seizure victim. In the end, Shit won out, and we were forced to restart our session.

Problems like this are abound in Shit, and for some odd reason seem to get worse the longer you play. By the third, and mercifully final, scenario we suffered through, entire pieces of our bodies began to disappear, so that most games were completely unplayable. The movie trailer that followed was a complete disaster as a result, often featuring people with gigantic holes through their chest, or missing limbs of every description.

While the women in my company were more than willing to continue play as their bodies crumpled all around them, I stoutly refused to continue under such conditions. Several relocations later, frustration led me to pull out an entire shower curtain, complete with rod, stack bar stools to the ceiling and drape it behind us, as a makeshift green screen. Unfortunately, because of subtle air currents, the merest movement from the curtain would cause the camera to have a panic attack, and a times completely cut out the person playing the game, or else feature the entire curtain in the scene, so that every game looked as if it was being played in a bathtub.

Even with a completely stationary background, sometimes the camera would add features into the picture that were nowhere near the person playing, resulting, once again, in some games being a completely pointless endeavor.

Shit is a troublesome game for quite a few reasons, the least of which is the fact that the paltry selection of mini-games are also entirely boring. The camera support is nothing short of atrocious, and there should be no reason at all for you to even give this game a try, let alone pay the hefty price to buy it. If there is, you're a shameful human being and you should probably consider suicide. There is a ray of hope for those of you disappointed with how poorly Shit turned out, though! That ray of hope? Own an actual green screen.

Over a decade ago, the fantastic, and sadly defunct, Black Isle Studios put out a little PC game called Fallout; a game that takes place in the post apocalyptic future, heavily influenced by the post-WWII paranoia of nuclear war that griped so many back in the 50's. The Fallout world is essentially a look at what life would have been like had technology never advanced following WWII, and if the entire world had been subject to The Great War; a nuclear war that rendered the entire world a wasteland.

Despite being developed and published by an entirely new studio, Fallout 3 doesn't diverge from the pre-existing setting, aside from being located in Washington D.C.. You're still a vault dweller, emerging from your Vault-Tec vault a certain amount of years following the war, and you've still got a vast wasteland to explore. Bethesda, who everyone will know as the developers of the The Elders Scrolls series, picked up the license off of the now (semi?) defunct Interplay. Although the setting and overall feel of the Fallout universe wasn't drastically changed when Bethesda got a hold of the license, the style and gameplay took a radical departure. Bethesda ditched the over-head camera, instead opting to go with the first-person/third-person camera from The Elders Scrolls, and the turn-based combat has been wiped away in favor of a couple FPS conventions.


Your typical Super Mutant following a headshot from a pistol. Yeah...pistol.

Although Fallout 3 does take place in first-person, it isn't a shooter by any means. It is possible to play the game successfully entirely in first-person, but as the game wasn't built as a straight shooter, with all attacks and chances to hit based on stats and invisible die-rolls, your accuracy with a gun isn't always as reliable as how well you aim. That's where VATS comes in. The Vault-Tec Assisted Targeting System is essentially the turn-based part of Fallout 3, although entirely optional, I went through the game using it almost exclusively. In VATS, the game is paused, and you decide which part of an enemy you wish to fire at. Depending on several different factors, including distance, weapon type, and your skill with said weapon, you'll get a percentage to hit on various parts of an enemies body. Things like the torso and legs are usually fairly easy to hit, while more deadly shots, such as the headshot, are normally more difficult. Once you choose your targets and the amount of times you want to fire, your amount of actions are based on AP points, the game will go into a cinematic style scene where the outcome of your choice is played out, normally with the exploding of an enemies head, or the loss of a limb. The combat stays fun and engaging throughout the experience, especially once you start to build up perks, get different weapons, and increase your skill points.

The brutality in Fallout 3 is so over-the-top, that it becomes fairly comical, and it seems entirely on purpose. The entire game world is filled with gags and amusing, yet painfully morbid, humor. Various perks, special abilities you choose as you level up, even extended the gore further. Bloody Mess, a perk that gives you a damage boost, also causes the majority of enemies you face to explode into a fountain of blood and gore, with limbs flying every which way, despite the fact you may have only shot them in the leg with a hunting rifle.

This over-the-top, brutal, sadistically funny style is sprinkled throughout the world. And although seeing an enemies head careening fifty yards away after a punch to the face is great for awhile, it does tend to wear, as it happens nearly every time you kill something. There are portions of the world where the immense amount of gore and sadistic nature of the inhabitants prove creepy, though, and sometimes overly so. When the game gets serious, it tends to go a little too far, which, at times, breaks some of the charm.

One huge part of the Fallout games has always been about stumbling across quests, and then solving them in the most sadistic way possible. Thankfully, that still holds true for Fallout 3. By now, everyone is well aware of the extremely publicized decision you get to make early on in the game, in which you choose whether to destroy an entire town, or save it, but there are many many more ways to prove how much of a complete asshole you can be. Clear a town of fire ants and find a lone kid there? Parents dead, all alone? Not my problem, kid! That jerk who picked on you when you were little? His mom is in trouble? Just pick the best option; “fuck you!” blow his head off and watch as his mom gets killed by radroaches. The options for being a dick, or being noble, are numerous, and pop up in almost every single conversation.


V.A.T.S. is the easiest, and quickest, way to rain destruction on your foes. It also results in exploding knee caps 2/3 times.

A problem that does strike the game, and rather quickly, is that it's actually fairly brief, especially considering the length of time it took to polish off Oblivion. The main quest is extremely short, clocking in at about 6 hours, depending on how quickly you find your objectives. It also ends rather abruptly, suddenly coming to a close long before you ever thought it would. Even more baffling is the decision to not allow you to continue messing around in the world following the last quest. Once it's done, it's done and the only way to go back is by loading a previous save file. There are numerous side-quests and even smaller mini-quests to complete to pad out the time, but unless you find them right away, you may find yourself finishing off the game before you see the majority of them. What's there is extremely satisfying, though, and many quests are a pleasure to undertake, specifically when it comes time to make some choices and completely screw with people.

Oblivion really had navigation down and, at times, almost seemed to have it down a little too much, as you'd be hand held from objective to objective. Navigation got some tweaks for Fallout 3, and while it holds your hand a lot less, it can be a problem at times, specifically when you get to the downtown area. Here, the various buildings are almost completely destroyed, and often times you'll find yourself having to travel through the vast, dreary, ghoul infested, and utterly repetitive underground train tunnels. While these range from extremely brief to overly long, they're all pretty much the same, and more often than not, you'll get lost, or come out somewhere you had no intention of going, often far away from your objective. It doesn't help that the navigation system on your Pip-Boy, what is essentially the menu screen, gets thoroughly confused about where you need to go to come out in the right section of the city. As most areas are completely blocked off, and only accessible via the tunnels, you'll need to go a very specific way to get there, and your Pip-Boy will almost always lead you in a confusing circle, or else to a dead end.

The “dungeons” in Fallout 3 follow the same basic design as the dungeons in Oblivion. That being that there are a few different kinds, and they all look exactly the same. In Oblivion, you would have caves, mines, ruins, Daedric gates or castles. In Fallout you've got caves, Vault-Tec vaults, train tunnels, office buildings and factory buildings. Each one feels like it was pieced together from the same construction set, and you'll notice many of the same trappings, enemies and scenery in each. Some are home to rather elaborate stories, while others are simply there for the sake of being there. There are many more unique “dungeons” than there were in Oblivion, but the majority are still minor variations of each other, spread throughout the world.


You'll slaughter at least a couple thousand of these before the game is over. You'll start to leave buildings as soon as you hear one. Annoying.

The fact that so much remains the same between Oblivion and Fallout 3 is a bit disappointing. While Oblivion was extremely impressive when it was released, things have since changed, and that engine is, unfortunately, beginning to show some age. Not only in terms of certain gameplay eccentricities, but in terms of the physical world itself. The impressive physics engine is less impressive this time around, with items flying off of shelves or desk with a mere nudge, or bodies flying insane lengths after being killed. The character models still look grotesque, and even the “attractive” characters would be welcome in a circus freak show. That being said, the environments are gorgeous, and the first time you step out of Vault 101 is extremely impressive, especially the draw-distance, which seems to go on forever. The wasteland...despite being a wasteland, is full of small details, and although objects in the outdoor environments are sparse, what's there still looks fantastic.

One omission made from Oblivion to Fallout comes in the form of the armor. While armor in Oblivion had taken a couple minor hits from Morrowind, (under clothes and over clothes, separate boots, gauntlets and pauldrons) the armor in Fallout 3 is nothing short of disappointing. The only equip-able pieces come in the form of general body armor and helmets. Being able to mix and match different pieces of armor was always a lot of fun in the Elders Scrolls games, and the fact that it's been dumbed down to this degree is disappointing.

In a couple ways, Fallout 3 does feel like a slightly dumbed-down version of Oblivion, except with guns and dismemberment. I'm not sure if this was something done intentionally, perhaps to make a stab at pulling in some of that ever present casual market, but it seems odd that they'd make that attempt, while simultaneously featuring some pretty hardcore stat-based combat mechanics. That being said, Fallout 3 is definitely one of those “sum of it's parts” games, where no single area of the game is spectacular, but as a package, it comes together extremely well, delivering a very satisfying experience. The combat is highly engaging, the world is sadistically amusing, and the quests are always entertaining. Do yourself a favor and pick this one up.

I'd like to start out this review as simply as I possibly can. Buy this fucking game. After you've bought it and found out just how terrific it is, tell other people to buy it, spread the word, because that's the only way this series is going to be able to keep going. If it doesn't keep going, I'll find out who you are, come to your house, and fucking gut you like Professor Pester guts a Polollybear on a bad day. Trouble in Paradise is, in most ways, the same as the original Viva Piñata. You're given a patchy, almost infinitesimally small, spot of land to call your own, and with that land, you'll begin to attract the various species of Piñata that inhabit the colorful Piñata Island. As you attract different species, their presence will attract further Piñata, which will allow you to level up, thus allowing you to see more different species of Piñata, as well as give you a larger array of plants, vegetables and fruit trees to grow, which, in turn, attract even more Piñata.

Each Piñata species, now numbered at over 100, has a specific set of requirements that need to be met for various events to take place. For instance, you won't get a Moozipan (A cow who's name sounds like marzipan.) to appear until you have a certain amount of your garden covered in long grass, a certain amount of a specific flower growing in you garden, and have a milk churn kicking around in there somewhere. Some Piñatas have much easier appearance requirements, like being a certain gardener level, or having a specific Piñata as resident, but there are some you may never see until someone tells you about them.


Piñata are black and white until they become a resident.

Once a Piñata has revealed itself to you, you then have to meet certain requirements for it to visit, and then meet more requirements for it to become a resident, so getting most species isn't a total cakewalk, and you'll have to work on it if you really want that Fizzlybear.

Your sole reason for getting these Piñata to reside in your garden isn't just so they can hang out and sleep all day, though. You'll also have to romance your Piñata. This is good not only for getting the Romancer and Master Romancer awards that net you a high amount of XP, but it even goes towards making still more Piñata become resident. On top of that, you now have the ability to create twin Piñata, depending on how well you play the Romance mini-game for each species, which has been altered this time around, where as before you would simply need to reach the end of a maze to successfully breed your Piñata, this time around you need to collect the prerequisite amount of hearts before reaching your mate.

As in the previous game, you still have the ability to create a Wildcard Piñata, (A species of Piñata with a unique trait, such as a Sparrowmint with horns, or a Jameleon with a three-pronged tail.) but this time around your chances aren't 1 in 10,000 or whatever ridiculous stat it previously was, now your chances of getting a Wildcard is entirely up to your ability in the Romance mini-game. These changes to the various aspects of romancing Piñatas are certainly welcome additions, and make the component much more interesting than it was previously.

The romancing aspect wasn't the only portion of the game to get a face-lift, however. Piñata Central challenges have also had a complete overhaul. In the original Viva Piñata, you would randomly get a call from Piñata Central asking for single, or multiple Piñata of a specific species. This time around, there a very specific challenges mapped out for you to accomplish, and the majority are much more elaborate than ever before. You'll usually need to not only send them a specific Piñata, but a specific variant of that Piñata, sometimes wearing a specific set of accessories, and they may even need to know a trick or two. Once their Candiosity meter if full, (A meter measuring the amount of candy a Piñata is filled with, that replaces the mood meter.) done by either feeding the Piñata certain foods it likes, or simply feeding it a joy candy, you send him packing via the always present Piñata Central crate on the boundary of your garden.

On top of these rather large improvements to two fairly important aspects of the game, there are also any number of small tweaks and changes that make the game easier to play, while also polishing a couple of small problems that cropped up in the original. For example, you now have the ability to buy seeds and fertilizer without the need to enter Costalot's store. Simply pull up your normal menu, and select your seed bag for a quick and easy way to get the things you need without the hassle of loading screens.

Another change made is slightly iffy, but something that certainly adds a bit more challenge. In the original Viva Piñata, the Ruffians and Professor Pester were nothing but slight nuisances, sometimes wandering into your garden to fill in a pond or, vary rarely, break a valuable Piñata. This was easily solved by purchasing a Captain's Cutlass and placing it in your garden, warding off all Ruffian's and Pester alike. As this item was easily obtained before the Ruffian's or Pester could make much of an impact, their threat was significantly lessened. In Trouble in Paradise, however, the Ruffian's make their appearance much earlier, without the ward item in sight, and to make things more troublesome, it no longer has any effect on Pester.


Pester is a complete fucking douche!

While this change isn't so problematic in itself, the fact that you can be busy tending to something in your garden when Pester shows up, unannounced, decides to break something of value, and be none the wiser, can be slightly annoying. Some kind of indication that he crept in would be welcome. He becomes significantly less bothersome as you gain more and more money, because his attempts to break the Captain's Cutlass and allow his Ruffian's in is solved by simply buying another one, and you can also afford to pay him off whenever he shows up, if you see him, of course.

Something that often plagues sequels to games involving cleverly named creatures is that the new batch never quite live up to what came before it. Trouble in Paradise is no such game. The new Piñata are terrific, and their names are equally as great as the Piñata from the original. None of them stick out, and all are welcome additions. Piñata like the Limeoceros and Sarsgorilla fit in so well, you'd think they were in the same game as a Horstachio, which is exactly how it should be. One thing that is a little odd are the increased amount of bird-type Piñata. There was already a rather large amount in the original, but they've added no less than 5 more to TIP, which does seem slightly off.

Another new addition comes in the form of the two new regions, the Dessert Desert and the Piñarctic. The idea of these new regions is fairly simple; you travel to them, via a signpost on the outskirts of your garden, and encounter exotic Piñata that can't be obtained anywhere else. The way in which you capture these Piñata is simple. You purchase and lay a crate trap, then bait it and wait for a Piñata to wander into its maw. Once the Piñata is caught, you take the crate and head back to your garden. After you've unpacked the crate, the Piñata will be in “visitor” status, and you must complete certain requirements in order for it to become a resident, just like a normal Piñata.


The two new regions are home to some of the coolest new Piñata.

These regions are neat, but overly simple, and in the long run, slightly pointless. Once you've acquired the handful of Piñata that inhabit the region, there's no reason to go back.

One problem that continues to weigh things down is the “full garden” message you'll receive every so often. As in the first game, once your garden begins to get too full, you'll have to start getting rid of stuff in order to continue doing whatever you're doing. It was understandable in the first game, and they've certainly improved it in TIP, but its existence is still an annoyance.

There will be a point in the game where it gets much worse than previous, though, and that's when you have certain Piñata blocked from visiting your garden. When this happens, there will be some circumstance that won't allow a specific species to get to your garden, there are simple solutions, but most of them can take awhile. The problems lies with the fact that while the Piñata are stuck in the environment surrounding your garden, they're actually taking up garden space. This is a huge problem at certain points, and severely limits what you can do until you finally get those Piñata released. It's bad enough to have visiting Piñata and NPC's taking up garden space, but having these completely hidden, out of the way Piñata taking up ridiculous amounts of space is poor design.


Your garden will get full in no time at all.

However, no complaint will ever hamper the fun you'll have with this game. The addicting nature of it is enough to drive anyone to a couple sleepless nights, at the very least. The additions of things like easier to obtain Wildcards, fleshed-out Piñata Central challenges, and even weird additions like the trick system and Piñata games go a long way to further increasing the re-playability of a game that already had a ton to begin with.

Further extending said re-playability is the new co-op and online support. At anytime, you can have a friend hop into your garden and start puttering around with you. Online, you can cultivate your garden with up to 3 other people, working towards the same goal, or else just messing around. As host of the garden, you're able to set limits to what people can do, or else let them run wild and do whatever they please. It's a lot of fun to all be working at something in hopes of enticing some specific Piñata into the garden, or else performing a group beating on a sour with 4 shovels all at once. More impressive is the fact that there's absolutely no slow down or stuttering of any kind. The game runs as well online as it does off.

If there's one game you desperately need to support, it's Trouble in Paradise. I don't care how old you are, what kind of friends you have, or you sexual orientation. You need to own this game. The new Piñata additions are fantastic, the tweaks and polish made to the core design make the game even more enjoyable to play, and the overhauls on certain side aspects of the game will keep you playing for a long time. Co-op and Online play are terrific additions, and work extremely well. You'd not only be doing the industry a disservice to not buy this game, you'd be doing yourself one. With a $40 price-tag, you'd have to be insane not to pick this up.